Knowing at 50

“In Buddhism, the term anattā (Pali) or anātman (Sanskrit) refers to the doctrine of “non-self”, that there is no unchanging, permanent self, soul or essence in living beings.” -“Anatta,” Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anatta

Knowing at Fifty

Everything stems from a certitude that time is running out
…You use hourglass metaphors without a hint of irony

Cleaning electric razors upset you because there’s only white stubble
…You actually choose one side of the bed over the other

Sex is a rarely-visited, exotic destination
…you buy a selection of colognes as consolation.

Women don’t look back at you when you walk past
…so dogs become a sudden and unanticipated blessing

Your attention is directed to leaves,
…fallen, veiny and brittle

You pick up other people’s trash the flotsam/jetsam of more earnest (read “younger”) people.

You’re good with your hands in your pockets
…and fondly remember of telegraphs you once received.

Younger People indulge you, each one of their smiles a charitable gift
…and so you smile back, gratefully.

Your wife doesn’t come to you when you call for her
…but yells “WHAT??!” from the other room.

A blessing is it to learn that “you” is, after all, a lie
… so so good, to die the one and only death.

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